Sauron and his Dragon
by Sir Fish Boy
Summary: What would you do if you found a ring, a dragon, and worked for the evil Sauron? That's exactly what Pippin and Legolas do.
1. The Finding of Corky and the Ring

** As you all know, I don't own LotR but I do own all of Corky except for his stomach. Don't ask why. Please R/R. **

Corky the Quark Eating Dragon

This story starts out in the Hobbit where you would Smaug the dragon. Smaug had a son that he named Corky because all Corky would do was eat quarks and say "corky." Well, Smaug didn't want to raise a little dragon so he stuffed the thing inside a firework shaped like a dragon's tail. Then Smaug did something drastic...something big...

***Lots of years later***

Frodo was sitting in the grass one day admiring the golden ring that he 'borrowed' from Bilbo. He heard a car radio that sounded kind of like Gandalf's car radio so he started to run in the general direction of the sound. Being the hobbit that he was he ran the wrong way and all of a sudden something fell out of the sky and smacked that dumb little hobbit so hard that it gave him amnesia and he was never to be seen again. _*halleluiah*_

Gandalf was speeding along in his convertible Corvette (running over a few hobbits that just happened to be crossing the road) with his radio so loud that everyone in Hobbiton could hear it. He skidded to a stop when he saw something floating in some nearby trees. It looked like a dragon tail shaped firework. "Ah, this will do good for Bilbo's party. I wonder who's it is? Oh well, who cares, it's mine now! But it does look like a dragon will just pop out of it any second and eat whoever it sees first! Huh, just another way to get rid of those nasty mean hobbits that annoy me everywhere I go." So he started speeding off in his car, listening to a Linkin Park CD with the volume on full blast. He never even noticed that there was a golden ring just lying in the ground...

***In Hobbiton***

"Hi Gandalf! It's good to see you back. Looks like you got a new car.", said a little hobbit named Pippin Took. "What's that you've got there? Is that a real dragon tail?"

"No! It's a firework that I'm going to use at Bilbo's party. Now go away and don't ask anymore questions or I'll make you swim across a river! If I ever see you again I'll aim this firework at you! GO AWAY AND STOP STARING AT ME!!"

Pippin ran off screaming and yelling his head off. He was absolutely terrified. He ran into some trees and stumbled over a tree root. He looked up and there, right in front of him was the Ring (and a cluster of mushrooms). 

"That's better. Now where should I put this?", said Gandalf while looking for a place to put the firework. Little did he know that the hobbit he scared off was stuffing his face with mushrooms and admiring the ring thinking of all the possibilities he had with it.

** It might be a little short, but it's my first story so maybe you could give me some ideas or some tips. And remember to review!! **


	2. Bilbo's Party

** YAY!!!!! Chapter 2!!!! Isn't it _soooo _exciting?!?!?!? YAAAY!!! Just ignore me and read this story or I'll annoy you till your dead!!! I'm not kidding!!!!! Really I'm not! **

Bilbo's Party

While Gandalf was evilly plotting to run over some more hobbits in Hobbiton, he didn't notice that the dragon tail shaped firework was just zooming away being carried by some invisible force. That invisible force was the all-powerful, ultra mighty, really short, annoyingly talkative, Pippin Took! Yep! You guessed it!

Pippin was so obsessed with the ring that he was in league with the evil Sauron now. What?! You didn't expect the innocent little hobbit (well, he's not that innocent now) to just let the One Ring sit there and rot away until a creature called Gollum could find it again did you?

***Sauron's Home***

"YEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!! He's finally got that little dragon. Soooooooo, I just need to steel the ring and then...Hahahahah...I'll be the proud owner of Middle Earth! Maybe I can turn him into the world's smallest orc. Then I'll have a dragon, a firework, a ring, Middle Earth, a really small orc, and I'll have made a world record! I'll be on TV! That was always what I wanted to do, is be on TV at least once in my life. Oh this will be so fun. Like soooo like fun! I like need to call my friends so like, go away!" said Sauron in a high pitched girly type voice. It scared most of the orcs so bad just to hear him talk that they dropped dead from fright right where they were standing. 

***In Hobbiton***

Bilbo was making plans for his birthday party. He was going to get everyone really fat and then they'd be really tired and want to go to sleep and then when they did go to sleep, he was going to steal their wallets and credit cards so that he could go get the present he really wanted. A brand new golf cart! Then it would be just his size and he could use it like a car. 'This is going to be the best birthday party ever.' thought a greedy future golf cart owner. 

Meanwhile, Merry was annoying Gandalf by saying 'hi' tons of times. 

"Hihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihi...(1000000000 hours later)...hihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihi!" said Merry really fast. "Whatchya doing? Guess what, guess what, guess what? I heard that Pippin found this really cool ring and that he's working for Sauron now and that he got Legolas to join him and that they have a really cool firework and that it has a dragon in it and that they're going to shoot it off at Bilbo's party and that the dragon is going to come out of the firework and eat you and that it will carry Legolas and Pippin back to Mordor and that it will be a really bad dragon and..."

Pippin continued on for another 500 years (no one knew how he stayed alive). Gandalf was begging Pippin to stop. He couldn't stand it any longer. He was almost brain dead. 

***1000000000 Hours and 500 Years Earlier***

Bilbo was eating at his party and giving all the hobbits their 37th plate of food. He was only on his 3rd. His plan was going really smooth until the hobbits decided to go on strike and not eat one another little bite of food in their whole lives. So, of course, Bilbo ate all the rest of the food and went to sleep and got his wallet and credit card stolen from him. He woke up a couple hours later only to find himself swimming in credit card bills saying that he owed zillions of dollars because his credit card somehow got used way too much.

Legolas and Pippin were riding to the party in Gandalf's convertible Corvette. Legolas was so amazed at how the top of the car just folded back and hid from him every time he pushed a button (he'd never even seen a car). He decided that the top of the car was folding up and hiding from him because it was making secret plans to get rid of Hobbiton whenever he pushed the button. He looked a label that was on the button and to his surprise, it said, 'Push this button if you want to make the top of the car fold up and hide and make plans to get rid of Hobbiton.' Legolas was really confused. How was he right? He soon figured out that he could predict the future.

Pippin was getting out of the car ("Legolas! Stop...**_ow_**...making...**_ow_**...the...**_ow_**...top...**_ow_**... of...**_ow_**...the...**_ow_**...car...**_ow_**...fold...**_ow_**...back...**_ow_**...and...**_ow_**...hit...**_ow_**...me!") He got the firework after finally convincing Legolas to stop playing with the car. 

"Pippin! Wait for meeeeeeee! I want to shoot the lovely firework off! Waaaaaaiiiiiiit!", said Legolas as he ran off after Pippin. 

Gandalf wasn't there to do the fireworks display so Pippin and Legolas did it. Everyone in Hobbiton knew that they were in league with Sauron, but they didn't really care. What could a hobbit and an elf do? It's not like they were going to shoot off a dragon tail shaped firework that had a baby dragon in it right? Legolas was having so much fun, he got carried away and knocked out a couple of hobbits with a single firework. 

"Hey Pippin! Let's let that little dragon out of the firework! Then maybe it'll eat one of these little annoying creatures that call themselves hobbits. No offense to you Pippin. But you are sorta annoying. Just kidding!", said Legolas.

So in the end, Pippin decided to shoot it off. 

"OK everyone," said Pippin with an evil grin. "Whatever you do, don't look up when we shoot off this firework. It's not going to be that exciting. So if you do look up don't freak out if you see a giant dragon come down and eat someone. Get it? Got it? Good!"

Legolas got a flamethrower and blasted a few hobbits while desperately trying to light the firework. He finally got the hang of it, lit the firework and gave it to Pippin.

"You dim wit, Legolas! You're supposed to stick it in the ground!"

"Well, it will be in the ground after you put it there. Good. Now, what's my line again? Oh yeah! It is in the ground!"

"It's supposed to be outside! Not under a tent! You dimwitted elf!"

"Well, it was your idea!"

"No it wasn't! You were the one that said 'Let's let that little dragon out of the firework' so I said that was a _good _idea, not that it was _my_ idea! When will you learn to listen?!"

The firework shot off with Pippin clinging to it for dear life. Of course, the hobbits couldn't help but look up and watch the firework explode. Even when they were told not to look up. But it's a firework! Your supposed to watch fireworks! Well Pippin fell off when he was about to blow up with the firework. He landed in a giant lake and swam back to shore. He wasn't hurt at all. Just a little mad at Legolas. 

Gandalf was inside one of the tents when he heard a firework explode and hobbits screaming their heads off like a dragon was chasing them. He ran out of the tent to see what was happening. He looked up (if there was a dragon flying around you'd look up to watch it...NOT!) which was a stupid thing to do because the 'little' dragon came swooping down. It looked like a giant dragon-balrog. A really big fireball. It snatched Gandalf off the ground, flew up really high, and dropped him into a cart full of fireworks. Gandalf was on fire from the dragon, so naturally the fireworks blew up when he hit them. 

The hobbits were really happy now that Gandalf was gone. The dragon came down to the ground to party with them. Pippin wasn't mad at anymore. He was so un-mad that he gave Legolas money for a new brain. (Legolas didn't find this very funny)

The dragon (Corky) took Pippin and Legolas back to Mordor. He got a job working for Sauron and Pippin gave Corky the Ring. Gandalf's ghost came back to haunt Corky. Just to be eaten. 

** It's a lot longer than ch. 1. Please review! Go ahead, it won't kill you! You just click and type in some words. **


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